


You've Seen the Darkest Skies I Know

by BluntArrow



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Origins, Dragon Age: Origins - Awakening
Genre: Bisexual Female Character, Multi, OT3, Open Relationships, Polyamorous Character, Snippets
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-05-11
Updated: 2016-05-12
Packaged: 2018-06-07 19:42:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,619
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6821515
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BluntArrow/pseuds/BluntArrow
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"On the one hand, the idea that all the suffering and pain will be worth something in the end might give comfort." </p><p>"And on the other hand, the idea of some unseen entity fucking with you just makes everything worse."</p><p>Important moments in Warden Mahariel's life, told in bits and pieces.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Treetop Kisses and Questionable Maturity

**Author's Note:**

> I'm planning on using Mahariel in a larger fic that I'm working on, but in the meantime I wanted to hash out her character and put some of my ideas down. Title taken from a Walk Off the Earth song, Home We'll Go, which I enjoy listening to while writing this character. Updates might be sporadic. I intend to update the tags as I go depending on what I put in each chapter but content should never get much more extreme than some bad language. Thanks for reading, comments welcome, and I hope you enjoy my writing.

Tamlen was a fucking idiot. This was a fact which Mahariel had known for as long as she could remember, but it never hurt to remind herself every now and then that her friend was a fucking idiot. Especially when he proposed another of his insane schemes. That was the perfect time to remind herself that he was a fucking idiot. Then she wouldn't end up in such ridiculous situations.

She should have known better when he skipped up to her with that look on his face that said 'I have a mad idea which is almost certainly going to land you in some kind of trouble.' If she had been smart she would have told him to fuck off the minute she saw that face. She had never been smart when it came to his stupid blue eyes. Tamlen had been complaining for months about how all the clan elders still treated them like children and whenever he brought it up within earshot of any of them Ilen would laugh and tell him to come back when he'd killed his first beast. The two of them wouldn't technically be of age to do that for another year, but Mahariel had watched Tamlen get progressively more impatient and irritated. She really should have known that it was only a matter of time before he proposed something as stupid as this.

"You want to hunt a bear? Did you hit your head again?" she frowned at him. Her father had had this way of practically radiating disapproval whenever she did something bad, like steal honey from the hearthmaster's supplies. He never had to say anything, he would just look at her and she would know he was annoyed. She had yet to master this skill but at least Tamlen had been giving her plenty of opportunity to practice. "Get Merrill to check you over. You really must duck whenever you come out of the aravel, you're taller than you used to be."

Tamlen rolled his eyes. "I didn't hit my head, _lethallin_. We're going to hunt a bear. If we want the clan to take us seriously then we need to prove ourselves."

She sighed. "Three questions. One, why are we not waiting a year to do this? Two, why have you not realised that the idea of the clan taking us seriously after that incident with the Elder Tree two months ago is nothing but a pipe dream? Three, why a bear? If you want the shit kicked out of you just try going one round with Fenarel, at least he probably won't eat you after."

"Take this seriously! I am!"

"That's what I'm afraid of."

"Lyna," he whined. Rarely did anyone use her given name. Tamlen only ever seemed to use it when he wanted something. "We're not waiting a year because there's no point! We already know how to hunt, we can do this now. And your third question answers your second question. A bear is what we need to prove our maturity and ability. Actually, two bears might be better..." She raised an eyebrow and he brought his hands up defensively. "Just one bear! Just the one!"

So, four hours after that conversation Mahariel found herself re-examining her recent choices and reminding herself that Tamlen was a fucking idiot and she should never listen to him ever. Listening to him was why she had to do all of this thinking from up a tree in between bouts of swearing at him in a rough mix of Elven and Common. Fifteen minutes in, Tamlen stopped trying to defend himself. Forty minutes in, Mahariel got tired of coming up with new and inventive ways to curse his existence and fell silent. After another hour of watching the two bears ( _two_ , because Tamlen had to tempt fate like the fucking idiot he was) circle their tree Tamlen finally sighed and murmured an apology. She scowled at him, but her anger had left her at least twenty minutes before.

"If we die up in this tree, Creators help me Tamlen, but I will haunt the shit out of your afterlife."

He smiled cheekily. "I don't think I'd mind if it meant having you around."

She snorted and averted her eyes. It wouldn't do to let him see how much those words alone had softened her. He might have been a fucking idiot but it was hard for Mahariel to stay angry at him for very long. "Those bears aren't going away. Any suggestions on how to pass the time?" His smile was answer enough.

Kissing Tamlen was nice. Easy and warm and comfortable. If they weren't perched in the branches of a tree she could meld herself to his chest and let him play with the ends of her long curls. Kissing him had always seemed so natural, like it was always going to be the natural progression of their relationship. Nothing about them changed, she didn't even think the rest of the clan knew for sure. They still spent almost all of their time together, they still went on wild adventures and got into more trouble than any of the other apprentices combined. The kissing, the cuddling, the whispered words of affection, were just more things that they could do together.

A momentary glance sideways was enough for Mahariel to push him away and start gesturing and whispering excitedly. Tamlen's eyes lit up when he saw what she had already noticed. The bears had both fallen asleep at the foot of their tree. They whispered plans under their breath before moving into position. They both dropped from the tree at the same moment, long hunting knives drawn and ready. The bears didn't even wake before they died. While Tamlen whooped and cheered and danced around their fresh kills Mahariel scanned the forest around them. It only took a moment for her to spot Merrill's face poking out from behind a tree. Merrill gave a smile and a quick wave before disappearing back towards the camp and Mahariel laughed softly, knowing she would have to thank Merrill for putting the bears to sleep.

The hunters didn't believe them at first when they said they had each killed a bear out in the forest. Tamlen relayed the tale gleefully while they led the hunters back to the corpses. It took effort to get the two bears back into camp and Mahariel and Tamlen were treated to the amazement and admiration of the whole clan as they marched towards the huntsmaster. They still weren't allowed to get their vallaslin for another year, but they had the clan's respect. At least until the incident with the sylvans three weeks later.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was inspired by a tumblr post by theshadowdreams.


	2. Big Hearts and Petty Revenge

Mahariel was always at her happiest when she was lying on her stomach beside Tamlen, with Merrill behind her tying braids into her hair. Merrill's chatter was as unending as it was soothing, only ever interrupted when Tamlen wanted to make a comment. Merrill had been an easy, natural addition to their little duo. When she was very young Clan Alerion sent her to Sabrae because they needed a First after Mahariel's father died and Marethari became Keeper. Merrill had been so quiet those first few weeks. The whole clan was quiet for a while, mourning their Keeper and one of their best hunters after Mahariel's mother decided to follow her heart into Falon'Din's embrace. Mahariel was grateful that her memories of that time were not all sad, she could look back and remember that not all of her life was shrouded in shadow. The good memories she had were thanks to Merrill and Tamlen. Tamlen had made it his mission to get Mahariel to smile again after her parents died, and when that failed he set his sights on Merrill, the quiet, shy little First. Her nervous babbling had been worse at first than it ever had been since then, but Mahariel found that the consistent stream of consciousness was comforting when the silence blanketing the clan got too stifling for her to handle. On the days when she needed quiet she would sit in the aravel with Ashalle, or if her new guardian was working Merrill and Tamlen would sit with her. Tamlen would lie on her legs and Merrill would sit braiding Mahariel's hair, saying nothing. So, in completing his second mission he also completed his first. It was the two of them that finally brought her smile back.

Ever since she joined them Merrill had always been a little isolated from the clan. She didn't study crafting or hunting with the others of their age group, the only time she really mingled with them all was when _Hahren_ Paivel taught them one of the stories. Whenever the other children were with the hunters or the craftsmen, or even just playing around the camp, Merrill was always with Keeper Marethari, learning how to lead the clan and use her magic. When they were seven years old they had known that it was important for Merrill to learn these things, but at the same time they thought it was important for Merrill to roll down hills and make the biggest splash possible when jumping to the lake. Mahariel had never much liked the Keeper who replaced her father but the way that Marethari had kept a vice like grip on her apprentice only cemented this. Even years later it often took Mahariel and Tamlen great effort to drag Merrill away from her work long enough to take a break. It had gotten easier to enlist Merrill's help in this after Mahariel kissed her for the first time.

That had been one of Tamlen's better ideas. "You could make anyone do anything just for a single kiss," he had urged.

"I'm fairly sure that only applies to your weak willed self," she had replied. Still, it was a better idea than any she had had. She pulled Merrill behind an aravel while the First stuttered out excuses that she didn't even seem to believe herself. She interrupted the stream of increasingly weak excuses with a murmured request. "Can I kiss you?"

Merrill's voice came to an abrupt stop. She stared open mouthed at Mahariel with red staining her cheeks. "W-wh-why?" she stammered.

Mahariel shrugged. "I want to know what kissing you is like." She wondered distantly if Tamlen had noticed the way Mahariel's eyes would sometimes focus on Merrill's lips and how she would sometimes come up with excuses to touch the other girl. Pulling her up off the ground, taking her hand to lead her somewhere, offering to help brush her hair. If Tamlen had noticed and this was his reaction, then he clearly wasn't upset about it. Mahariel, personally, didn't really understand why he would be upset; wanting to kiss Merrill didn't mean she wanted to kiss him any less. Some of the hunters had said things about _jealousy_ and _heartbreak_ and _cheating_ and _adultery_ , all things that Mahariel understood in theory but made no sense when she applied it to herself and Tamlen. Maybe it didn't make sense to Tamlen either. Merrill bit her lip and her eyes flitted around nervously. For a moment Mahariel thought she might tell her to go away, that she hated her, _that she would rather die than_ -

"All right, yes," Merrill whispered.

The twisted mix of relief and nerves knotted into Mahariel's stomach as she licked her lips and leaned in. The first brush of their lips was so gentle and light that it almost tickled. Mahariel shivered and took Merrill's hand, lacing their fingers together, as she pressed closer and kissed her firmly, eagerly. Merrill returned the kiss, enthusiastic but unsure. She let out a quiet sound that was caught and lost between their mouths. Her free hand went to Mahariel's shoulder and she gripped the soft leather between her fingers. They pulled away from each other with laboured breaths. They stood, still close enough to kiss with only a slight tilt of a head, reluctant to let go of each other. Mahariel licked her lips, chasing Merrill's taste.

"You should try kissing Tamlen," she said, a foggy look over her eyes that was matched in Merrill's own. "He's a good kisser."

"Yes," Merrill sighed. "Yes, that might be nice."

Mahariel grinned breathlessly. Tamlen had had the biggest shit-eating grin on his face when the two of them ran up to him, hand in hand.

Lying on the ground with halla milling around them and Merrill tying dozens of braids into her long coarse black hair Mahariel smiled as she remembered that first day. She remembered how the three of them had sprawled out on the bank of a river away from the camp, away from prying eyes. She remembered how that afternoon was filled with laughter that lasted into the evening, and how the three of them had exchanged kisses in the grass.

Tamlen wriggled around on the ground like a particularly uncoordinated snake until he was on his back with his face directly below hers. He tilted his head up, aiming for her lips, but ended up kissing her wide nose instead. She snickered and Tamlen made a face, flopping back down on the ground.

"What was Redcliffe like?" Merrill asked suddenly. "Did you meet anyone interesting?"

"Oh didn't she tell you yet?" Tamlen grinned.

"Oooh, you did meet someone!" Merrill said. "What were they like?"

Mahariel grinned. "So, there was this tavern in the village where the other hunters and I were staying. There was this pretty redhead girl, Bella, working there when we went in. She actually gave us a decent room and when the owner, some shem called Leonard or Lom or something, found out about it I thought his head might explode. He couldn't tell us to fuck off without losing business and looking rude in front of all his other patrons so we got to keep the room. We were there a couple of nights while we were trading so I got to talk to Bella whenever I saw her. She hated working for that shem, her pay was shit and he was always groping her, so I made sure a couple of unpleasant incidents would befall him."

Tamlen and Merrill chuckled. Mahariel always enjoyed exacting justice on humans in a multitude of ways. That tavern owner was likely to wake up with an oddly convenient hole in his roof that dripped water right on his bed, or he would discover all his cheeses missing from the pantry.

"It wasn't much, but at least Bella will get a laugh out of it," she grinned. "I told her about some of it the last night I was there and she was so pleased she gave me a kiss to say thanks. And then a few more kisses just because she liked me."

Merrill cooed. "That's sweet. Maybe you could see her if the clan ever goes near that village again."

"That owner better watch out if you do," Tamlen said with a wicked grin.

Merrill finished with the last of her braids and Mahariel rolled over onto her back and pulled Merrill down for a kiss. Tamlen swore and moved his head out of the way just in time. He pouted at the two of them when they parted and laughed at him until Merrill soothed his pout with a sweet kiss of his own. Mahariel settled into the grass, watching her lovers kiss above her. Eventually her eyes drifted closed and she finally relaxed enough to doze off to the sound of Merrill and Tamlen whispering over her. Spending time with the two people she loved was all the reprieve Mahariel needed from the world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just for clarity's sake, Merrill, Mahariel, and Tamlen are all teenagers at this point in the story, probably around seventeen as I headcanon Dalish elves getting their vallaslin at eighteen, and it takes place around the same time as the Bear Incident in the last chapter. I finished this part unusually quickly. Maybe don't get used to this kind of update schedule. I'd appreciate any comments or kudos as I am desperate for validation.


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